Where to Now?

So many GEN-Xers and Sandwich Generationers are facing a very challenging situation. How to care for their parents in a loving and sensitive way and still have a life of their own. The Sandwich Generation is involved with caring for both parents and children! They have strong feelings about social security payments; especially as the fund "apparently" erodes. This is happening against a backgound of the significant "graying" of America. So, I thought Spirituality and the Elderly might be a great series to discuss for the next week or so.

Actually, Phil Davis started this discission with his Guest Blog on January 22, 2006. In his blog, he discussed the subject of Spirituality, and Death and Dying, as a real experience involving the death of his mother. He also received a very strong response to his blog, indicating, most of all, the emotional, social, economic, and political nature of this subject.

The first premise I would like to put forward is that unless we approach this subject from a spiritual perspective, then win/win all around is not possible. I have discussed previously on this site what I mean by spirituality. It is that which comes from within, beyond the belief structures we have adopted (mostly unconsciously) or have been taught. We begin by first examining our belief structures about what it means to be elderly.

The most common thoughts are useless, slow, burden, out-of-touch, expensive, time-consuming, wisdom, fun, and child care! There are also the feelings that the 50+ generation have about themselves. They are, for the most part, an overlay of the thoughts I mentioned above. However, they also involve much more overarching thoughts. Namely, the meaning of their lives, regrets, anger, and what lies beyond. Thoughts that are not on the radar screen of younger generations; thoughts which are spiritual in nature.

So the process of bridging relationships across generations begins with understanding where each is "coming from"; in essence, their context of thinking. Actually, any authentic relationship begins with this premise. So, I guess what I'm saying is that dealing with the elderly, however we uniquely define that term, begins with examining our own preconceived notions as well as how "in-depth" we really understand ourselves in relationship to anyone. If relationship is all about one's self, then there is still much learning ahead--whether it involves the elderly or anyone else.

Spirituality comes about when a breakthrough event allows us to truly experience what humility is. It reduces the ego to zero. And what is left is "empty and meaningless!" Think about this last statement before reacting to it. Because, unless we have had this experience, in our own unique way, spirituality might still be an intellectual concept. More to come and how-tos only after we have dealt with our mind-set.

Take advantage of the free audio download of Chapter Two of Rodney for kids of all ages!