Where to Now?

If you create your own reality, whether consciously or unconsciously, then you are not only responsible and accountable for every event that happens in your life, but also for creating the probability of that event, in advance! This statement is obviously the graduate course in self-mastery. Let's examine the implications of such a statement as a way to live your life. For it can be overwhelmingly powerful and insightful.

Several years ago, I facilitated an outdoors "Ropes Course." Individuals, in teams and alone, would attempt physically-demanding events on the ground and at great heights. One of the great-heights event involved climbing a shaved tree that was about 50 or 60 feet high which had a shaky platform on top. The objective was to climb to the top of the tree, somehow stand on the platform, and jump for a swinging trapeze significantly out of reach. Most of the team laughed when the instructions were first given. With a sober face I asked, "Are there any questions?" Then I simply said, "Okay, who needs to go first?"

They huddled for five minutes and made a decision. Among the team of five men and one woman, it was decided the woman would go first. She was obviously terrified from the start. She asked about the small size of the platform, which she didn't know was shaky at that point. I told her not to worry about the platform until she reached the top; if she reached the top! Then I took her aside and said, "I know you can do this. I saw how athletic you were on the other events."

She replied, "I'm afraid of heights." "Perfect," I said. "This is your chance to lose what is underneath that fear." "What do you mean?" she asked. I instructed her to ask herself a question everytime she felt she was about to fall or wanted to give up on the event and she would get her answer.

By the way, this is obviously a harnessed event!

She made it to the top and began crying. I told her crying was great. That she was experiencing "tears of joy." She mounted the shaky platform and informed me she was ready to come down. I asked her to think about this decision she was about to make. I asked, "Is this about where you stop in life, when winning the gold is within your each? You certainly have good reason to stop now, even though you know you can catch the trapeze." One of her team members blurted out, "Why don't you let her down, you can see she's done her best!" I ignored him, of course, since he was really projecting his own fear he would have to face if he got that far.

After three minutes of soul-searching, she asked me to help her get into a rhyhtm to jump for the trapeze. I told to think of something she had always wanted in her life, but could never reach. (Something always happened that wasn't her fault; which meant she wasn't responsible; but she was always there!) Then picture the success of that thing sitting on the trapeze swinging back and forth in front of you. The question at this point was not could she catch the trapeze, but if she chose to do so; and what would be the implications if she succeeded! Literally, her life's direction was swinging there before her captured in a single jump.

Obviously, this event had transcended a physically-challenging exercise. (mind-body stuff) So, then I told her, "It's time to make a decision, we have other people for this event, take responsibility for choosing to fail or succeed! Focus on your heart talking to you. The next time the trapeze comes within your reach, either follow your heart or the self-limiting conversations of your mind."

Before I could finish my statement, she jumped for the trapeze going beyond its reach, so charged was her energy and intention. So, she hung there holding on with one hand, crying and laughing simultaneouly. Then she clutched the bar with her other hand. She seemed to be swinging in slow motion. I told her to let go, that she was successful. She was in another world. She didn't even hear me. Nor would she ever hear those who supported her limitations in the future. Her reality about her capability was transformed forever!

The realization she shared that night at our debrief was that in that moment of indecision, she recounted a sequence of events in her life where she had stopped short in her academic performance, participation in sports, choice of a boyfriend she really wanted at the time, and her present career in life. She could clearly see now that she made those decisions without conscious awareness, but nevertheless, she made them and she was responsible and accountable for the limitations she placed upon herself.

Now she could consciously decide to live her life with full intention, with the freedom to decide, and the realization that she had the power to create her own reality.

Responsibility and accountability are the most fundamental concepts to mastering the human experience; no matter what your race, culture, circumstances, history, or whatever you might have been using to sell yourself short! This is the most important principle for success no matter how you uniquely define it.